ceaseless oceans 5

I came to your house for selfish reasons

And when I got there,

I dodged past trash bags filled

With your old polos and sweaters,

I opened the closet where you recently found

Your souvenir pistol from the Korean war

And I looked for hidden treasures.

Your jackets are very puffy.

The house was dark and quiet.

Behind, the woods have thinned

So that I could almost see the neighbors house

When I pulled my pants down to pee.

The boat was covered in snow, which tonight

Will turn to ice. I heard a whipperwill,

Driving in with the windows down,

But it could have been somebody’s clock.

Almost no one is home this time of year.

Nobody recognizes me.

I went to nauset fish like we always do

And he treated me like a tourist,

Gave me the whole bit about how accurately

He can cut salmon.

Small objects hold you.

That glass bobble with black and gold splattered inside,

Your canes stacked in a corner,

The view from your bedroom window

Which I have hardly ever seen in my life but I imagine

You knew so well by the time you were gone

You barely looked at it anymore.

I am looking now at the branches like upturned hands,

At the clouds scattered above cedar panes all the way to the ocean.